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Au Revoir, My Past

February 29, 2008

Ever wonder why do I remove all the older entries all of a sudden? This post shall reveal the answer.

For those who have been constant readers of my blog, I owe them a thousand thanks—while it is unexpected that my blogger life still survive despite my lacking of perseverance, it is even more unexpected, and amazing that my blog has received more than a 1000 views.

Back then when I was posting my first blog entry, my life was a bed of roses. I led a care-free life, having a devil-may-care kind of attitude. The purpose of my blog, was to share my joy with the blog readers.

But then things changed. I would ponder in front of my monitor, wondering if there is anything worthy to write. My dream was shattered, and my life was forced to change it course—everyday I suffered from intensifying mental tumult and maelstrom. If there was anyone to be blamed it would be myself, my own skeptical, sensitive and weak mind.

Gradually my blog becomes a channel to vent all my frustration and depression. That, was the time that I posted only encrypted posts. How irony, I encrypted it because I hoped that the person would actually ask me for the password.

And eventually the quality of my post deteriorated to the extent that I deem it unworthy to the readers. It became nothing but despondent, hopeless and useless self-pithiness. Those posts were only meaningful to me while I was writing them.
I loathed the self-pithiness and meaningless of my older entries. I intended to delete my blog and started a new blog, but Chew suggested me to delete all my older entries instead. As for why I chose to turn this personal blog to an “educational” blog—

At least, mathematical truth doesn’t change over time. They will still be meaningful after eons.

Human feeling and emotion changes over time. They are only meaningful at the time when they still persist. When they are gone their history is worthless.

Perhaps, if I am leaving abroad for my tertiary study, I will rewrite personal post for my families, in order to inform them about my situation over there.

But now, this particular blog shall consist only of mathematical post.

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